The sculptor; part 7

The next day I find a note shoved under my door.

"Abstinence lets the creativity flow."

Your Mentor.

WTF?

I take of my flip-flop and throw it to the wall. Leaving a dusty mark on the face of the sculptor I drew  - during his act of creativity.

And then I have a wicked idea.

I get a brush and some acrylic paint, a clean new sheet of paper and I let my creativity flow.

Some hours later I walk to the stairs of the Painting Department, with a roll of paper under my arm.

From the corner of my eye I see the sculptor sitting on a bench. His long legs stretched out before him. Arms folded. His hair, as always, partly covering his face.

But I feel he is watching me, so I give him the finger.

I can see his chest moving in a silent chuckle.

In one of the classrooms I unroll the papers and with pushpins I hang my drawings to the wall of the exposition area of the faculty.

Sas and Martin join me. Their mouths drop open when they see my exposée.

"Are you really going to show that?" Martin cries out.

"Whoa, Hálwen! These are ... well almost, pornographic ... who are the models ... the guy looks like ... oh my god! Hálwen!" Exclaims Sas, pulling my sleeve. "Did they model for you?"

"No, I ..."

"Awesome work." The other students enter and show their appreciation for my drawings.

The rest of the class hang their stuff on the wall and the waiting is for Joshua, our professor, to present our work.

At first Joshua just stares at my work.

Then he mumbles: " Abstinence ... lets the creativity ... flow."

I painted the words over the drawings of the coupling I made. I accentuated Eddie's distinct features, and the sexual act they were involved in with strong brush strokes. Somehow the words make it graffiti like, and give it a forbidden atmosphere. But the eyes of the sculptor make contact with the spectator, the concentrated lust on his face seem to touch the onlooker into the soul, giving the drawings a very personal feel. Intimate. Like an accomplice in the act of voyeurism.

The professor turns to me. His cheeks are red.

"Hálwen, did he give you consent?" Looks at my drawings again.

" My dear girl, your work is amazing."

He grabs me and kisses me on the cheeks.
"Bravo."

After evaluating all the works everyone is leaving the classroom and when I am about to go I see Eddie leaning against the doorpost.  Again, with arms folded across his chest, his head a bit crooked, looking at me from under his mass of hair.

"Tell me..." He begins in a low voice, stroking his hair back and revealing a furrowed brow on his beautiful face. “.... what claim you think you have on me exposing me in such a ruthless manner."

He walks to my drawings. Takes them in for a while. Nervously I start to bite my nails.

He nods, and turns back to me.

Observes me.

I rub my hands over my thighs, waiting for him to continue, waiting for his verdict.
My cheeks burning with shame.
He is so right. How could I expose him so. And for what: for setting fire to my loins?

After an uncomfortable silence he gives me a wink and with a crooked smile that doesn't reach his eyes he says.

"But I was right. It does let creativity flow."

And then he brushes past me.

With drooping shoulders I arrive in the canteen. Martin and Sas wave at me and pull back a chair at their table.

"Darling, what's wrong?" Martin asks.

"You look like shit, girlfriend. What happened after the euphoria of the presentation?" Sas joins in.

"Oh guys...I fucked up."

"Fucked up?" They echo.

"I'm in love." I say and sigh.

"Well, that's a good thing. Right? A happy thing." Says Martin.

"With whom?" Sas asks, elbowing Martin.

I sigh again...shake my head.

"It's too stupid. With Eddie."

My friends reprimand me. Laugh at me. Try to comfort me. Question me. Declare me mad. Hug me. And try to cheer me up by cooking for me, by trying to get me drunk and by taking me to a small venue where a couple of local bands are going to play.

So here I sit. In the ladies room, and Sas is on the other side of the door trying to lure me out.

"Come on. We already missed the first band."

"No. I want to stay here."

"For ever?" She teases.

"He hates me now."

"Probably yeah. But he will get a blow job by some bimbo tonight and all will be forgotten."

"Fuck you, Sas!" And I open the door.

"Come on, you silly." Sas pulls her arm around me. "Let's go outside, take a puff."

After Sas and I smoked a bit we just sit outside on the ground and stare. At the traffic in the distance, at the lights, at the trees, at a couple of guys coming our direction.

When they get closer I recognize three of them. Students from the Monumental Department and one 4th year painter. Behind them another guy. And as if the red sea opens up in front of me I can see it is Eddie. Must be the puff that gives me this intense visual. But it is Eddie. And he does approach.

He kneels in front of me.

"Well, well...the frisky child..."

I know I must look a mess.

But somehow I take courage from his empty face.
It just can't get any worse. But then I hear myself say:

"Eddie ... I don't want abstinence."