Nanny in Vancouver, part 17

I stare at him.

My feelings are racing through me, but I already know which emotion is going to win.

And I can see it in his eyes that he knows too. His eyes are half closed and there is a slight smile on his face.

But if I do. If I do want him to fuck me. Oh, I know I do. But then? After? What then? The mind fuck? Do I want that too?

Slowly I shake my head.

He frowns.

The smile disappears from his face.

His fingers pluck at the fabric of his wet top. He pulls it. Suddenly rips it off and with a curse throws it in a corner of the room. I back away and feel the handle of the door against my spine.  I put my hand behind my back and grab the doorknob, push it down.

In two steps he moves to me, slams the door close and leans against it with one hand next to my head.

He looks down, his amazingly blue eyes under those furrowed brows seem to hypnotize me. A drop of sweat slowly seeks its path along the outline of his face, from his temple over his cheek to the corner of his mouth.

"I'm sorry." He murmurs.

I close my eyes when the warmth of his mouth covers my lips. Gently he sucks on my bottom lip, but the urgency with which he grinds his crotch against me makes every reluctance I might have felt go away.

I moan against his mouth, my tongue welcoming his. His skin under the palms of my hands is so smooth and almost feverishly hot. Every muscle on his seemingly skinny body feels hard. Like he can explode anytime. His touch is rough. He kneads my buttocks, the small of my back. He forces one leg between mine. Pushes me up against him. With one hand he pulls down my tights a bit so he can slide his fingers under the edge of my panties.

The rubbing of his calloused fingers makes me gasp his name.

It is a signal he was waiting for, because he lifts me up and carries me to the sofa in the corner of the dressing room. His mouth doesn't leave mine when he lays me down.

With trembling fingers I help him open the front of my dress. He peels the flower patterned fabric down from my shoulders, uncovering my upper body. The dress pushed down that way makes it impossible for me to move my arms. They are pressed against my body. Making me feel defenseless somehow, but excites me utterly. He kisses my collarbone and the part of my breasts that isn't covered by my bra. I can not lie still and move my hips against his, feeling his boner getting even harder and bigger.

He glides of the sofa to take of my boots and roll down my tights and panties. With a brooding look in his eyes he moves my knees apart and touches me between my legs. Without losing eye contact he starts stimulating me. The look on his face is so intense that I just have to close me eyes.

"Lotte...look at me."

He unbuttons his shorts and pulls them down.

Seeing him almost naked like this makes me catch my breath. He holds his cock and leans over me, rubbing it against the inside of my thigh.

"Eddie, wait."

His expression is that of disbelief.

"...I can't..."

"Just wait, you silly." I laugh as I try to get up and release myself of that dress.

Now I take the initiative and push him back on the sofa. I grab his penis and cup his balls with my other hand. Weighing them, playing with them. I can feel his heart pulsing in his hard but silken rod. Slowly I move my hand up and down over his length.

I bent over him.

"Let me taste you." I whisper and take him in my mouth.

I've never done this before, but I must be doing it right - because Eddie is panting and moaning and with his fingers he touches himself and my mouth - the way my lips and tongue pleasure him. He  claws my hair, the back of my neck, my shoulders.

"...oh jesus, Lotte..." He gasps.

He pulls me up. Positions me in a way that he can enter me. But he doesn't. I feel the pressure of the top against me, sliding in a bit, just a bit. But he moves away again.

"Eddie," I beg, "I want to feel you inside me....so bad."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes...you jerk...fuck me, already!"

He just laughs and gets up, takes a condom from his pocket.

I'm standing on my knees on the sofa now, waiting while he rolls the rubber over his dick. His lovely hair hangs over his concentrated face. I stroke his round little butt. He is so...so pretty. I giggle.

He raises his brow and pulls me against him. He kisses me. Hard. Pushes me on my back and with one thrust he plunges himself into me. I cry out in surprise.

Eddie doesn't move. He just lies on top of me. Breathing heavy.
He fills me up, real deep, real pleasant. This is what I want. I almost purr.

"...shit...how I longed for you....for this...so much...." Eddie mumbles with his deep voice.

And then slowly, rhythmically he begins to screw me. His hands next to my hips, his hair stroking my body with every thrust. His eyes on me, blurred though.

With a crack the door opens and a head appears.

"Sorry, Eddie?"

"What!"

"Sorry, Ed. There's two people looking for a girl."

The guy looks at me, although Eddie tries to hide me from his vision.

"Fuck off!" Eddie yells at him.

"Is she here?" I hear a familiar voice.

Chad.

"Lotte?" Ivy sounds worried.

Eddie's expression gets distant. He retreats and hands me my dress.

"You'd better go."

He looks really angry.

"Eddie, no...I..."

He grabs his shorts and puts them on again. Walks to the door.

"Go with Chad, Lotte." He says with a tired voice before he leaves the room. Slams the door behind him.

In total silence I get dressed. Ivy looks at me. I can see she almost bursts with curiosity.

Chad just said he was going to get the car. He would see us later.

"We were so worried when you ran away from the show like that." Ivy says suddenly.

"I thought you would come back later. But when you didn't return...and even when the concert was over you were still gone...well ,Chad went to the management, asked around...they said the're quite a lot of junkies around....so it wasn't really safe for a girl alone...Lotte! What's with you and that singer!"

I just listen to Ivy babbling and wonder where Eddie might have gone.

Again he sends me back to Chad.

Shit.

Why don't we ever talk.

"Give me your lipstick," I say to Ivy.

And with big capital letters I write the words on the mirror of the dressing table.

I AM NOT AMY!